DIRECTIONS TO KOHOUTENBERG

by Baron Von Stavenhagen

All directions must be followed precisely. From Victoria Station, London, take the night train to Calais and pick up the steamer Nebacudnezzer to the former colonial capital of Abbysinia. From your port of debarcation, catch the 4:15pm local train heading for Djibouti. At the highest point of elevation along the route, the Karg pass, there is a small station, barely a station really, where the train will stop to take on water for the steam engine. De-train there and take a small strong dark Italian coffee at the Cafe Martin on the Rue des Eleves, just off the main square. You'll soon be approached by a Senegalese named Waly Moussa. He'll arrange for bearers and supplies and lead you to the entrance to the Valley of Oourat. From there you'll take charge of your bearers, leading them for two days along the trail which follows the stream which irrigates the Valley. Just as you begin to tire of the whole escapade, just as you start to think that you must be lost, or have made a severe mistake or are on a fool's escapade, you'll be met by a functionary of the Institute who will lead you safely and quickly to Kohoutenberg.